The Battle
Jul 17, 2006
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” (2 Cor. 4:16-18)
Never in my life have I felt like I’ve been under such great attacks as of lately. God has been showing me so many things, and I just know Satan hates it. He loathes it so much that sometimes I feel as if I can feel him breathing down my neck. (Much like the same way those scary death looking things on Harry Potter breathe onto Harry. Side note I know, but I’ve been watching the movies lately. Quite good. Now I know why the books and movies were such big hits.) Most of you may know that we live in a world that is under attack. Ever since the fall of man this world and we ourselves have been under attack, and never more clearly have I seen that it is a battle for our hearts and the stakes are very high. Whatever captures our hearts will have a hold on us. If porn and lust capture our hearts then we are slaves to it. If busyness captures our hearts then we will never truly rest. If folly captures our hearts then we will never walk in our purpose and be who we are meant to be and do the things we are meant to do. However if Christ captures our hearts then our hearts are truly free and alive and we will become all that we are supposed to be. Don’t you want to be all you’re supposed to be? Don’t you long to be something great like a great hero or heroine of your favorite story tale, book or movie? Down deep in your heart what do you dream? What do you almost dare not even speak of for fear of ruining it or not living up to it?
Don’t you recognize that everything in life attests to the fact that we are at war? Why is it that many of the movies we love all have a battle going on and it is a fight of good and evil? Think of it-Star Wars, Braveheart, The Chronicles of Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Gladiator even Sleeping Beauty. The list is endless. Could it be that all of these movies reflect our own state of war? (Thank you John and Stasi Eldredge for pointing out these facts.) Well that battle for me lately has been the same old song and dance. I desire to do so much and then I feel I am doing nothing. That I am contributing exactly jack crap to this world and why try anyway because it won’t truly make a difference. I desire to make a difference. I desire to be great. Don’t we all? And for those of you that say no, then maybe you’ve already lost the battle for your heart or have buried it anyways.) Find it! Fight for it! You are worth it! You can make a difference! I say these things as much for myself as for others because I forget it daily. May God continually remind this fragile heart! It is Satan’s plan to make us lose heart for if we do then we will never be or do what we are supposed to. That makes me angry. We must recognize that the spiritual warfare around us is great far greater than we even know I am sure, but we have to learn to recognize it or before we know it we are no longer a threat to our enemy because we are either far too busy or we are lifeless. Do not for one second think, “What do I have to offer really?” What you have to offer is great. Perhaps far greater than we will ever know otherwise why else would Satan care to try and capture our hearts and make us believe that we are worthless? Friday, I felt truly worthless. It was one of those days that I didn’t have anything to do. Now for some of you you’re thinking, “And that’s a problem how…?” =) Being a freelance musician there are days when I don’t really have much to do. Now I love being busy, and I hate not having things to do so when this happens I hate it. I’m sure that there are many things that I could be doing but when it’s not something I have to do these are the days when I find myself just sitting. Friday was one of these days, and I was under attack. I felt worthless. I kept hearing “how am I contributing to this world in any way? How am I making a difference? My life is meaningless. I don’t even know what to do or where to begin! I know God has called me to certain things but how? I am worthless. Now I know that these are all lies, but I couldn’t help but feel this way. I think I’ve been under such attack because I have almost finished my album. Now what better way to get me to do nothing with it than to make me feel worthless and that I’ll never succeed? It works on me a lot sometimes. I praise the Lord for my husband who as I was sitting on the couch almost in tears came walking in the door of our apartment early from work. Totally unexpected. Michael never comes home unexpected. He always calls beforehand, but he was on the phone when he walked through the door so he was unable to call me. It was then that I poured out my heart to him of how I was feeling worthless and that my life was meaningless and what was I doing anyways? He smiled at me and took my hands and we got down on our knees and prayed together. Then he reminded me of all the things that God had been doing in my life and the calling he has given me and how I am not worthless. Praise the Lord that I have been given such a wonderful helper and friend! All of this to say is that because we are under attack we must learn how to fight. We must pray. We must put on our armor DAILY if we are to not lose hope and be all that God wanted us to be. To the most religious people of his day Jesus strongly warned against a loss of heart. He knows that Satan will aim his darts at our hearts and if pierced we will become unusable, unable to fight. For he knows we are dangerous. We as believers when knowing the immeasurable goodness, love and mercy of the Lord will not be able to help but tell others about the saving message of hope we hold on to. That is dangerous and also extremely valuable and because is valuable it is worth fighting for. Fight for your hearts my dear ones just as the voice keeps whispering to me to fight for my own and remember that you are valuable and very precious.
“greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world” (1 John 4:4)
